Introduction

The Pledge

1. The Scale of the Ambition

2. The Dangerous Quest for Compatibility

3. The True Romance of Pessimism

4. Why on Earth am I With This Person?

5. What We Should Learn From One Another

6. The Secret Lives of Other Couples

7. Continuing the Conversation

8. Overcoming Our Parents

9. A Trust Checkup

10. How We See Ourselves - and How Our Partner Sees Us

11. The Little Things

12. How We Like to be Loved

13. Early Wounds

14. A New Ritual: The Morning and Evening Kiss

15. Unconscious Belittling

16. The Anxious-Avoidant Quiz

17. Projecting Emotions

18. Indirect Communication

19. A Better Kind of Evening

20. How I am Difficult to Live With

21. A Forgiveness Ritual

22. A Gratitude Ritual

23. Our Conspiracy

24. Admiration

25. The Weakness of Strength

26. Hidden Efforts

27. Undelivered Compliments

28. How to Complain

29. A Pessimistic Interlude

30. How to Argue

31. Concrete Change

32. Change is Possible

33. Be the Change You Want to See

34. Five Questions to Ask of Bad Behaviour

35. Talking About Sex

36. The Sensate Focus Method

37. Accepting the Problems

38. Less Pressure on Love

Conclusion

The Couple's Workbook

homework to help love last